Collapsible Fate
by gooberbot
Summary: POTS one shot. Somebody is always mentioned when people think about her. Nobody ever thinks about the one who would miss her most. Nobody.


Summary: POTS one shot. Somebody is always mentioned when people think about her. Nobody ever thinks about the one who would miss her most. Nobody.

Collapsible Fate

By strawbeby

Neal sat in the front of the chapel, with his head in his hands.

"Today we honor a great lady."

Honor isn't the word for it. There is nothing in the world that could honor her for what she was.

"She entered a world that was never meant for her, but she loved it and what it stood for."

And she carried it all off with grace. I could never appreciate how well she handled all of it.

"She died for a cause that she was proud of. She would have never accepted anything less."

Always proud. But you know that she was proud of what she stood for, what she represented, and not really herself.

"Now let us take a moment of silence to remember Lady Knight Keladry of Mindelan."

Neal couldn't help it. He couldn't keep the tears from falling. I've failed you Kel. I've dropped my own Yamani mask….

He felt so alone. Despite the hundreds of people swarming around him to 'pay their respects' to her, he felt isolated from them. Even his fiancé couldn't console him.

He couldn't talk to anyone. He'd be too afraid that he couldn't see their faces without remembering her.

Lord Wyldon was here, showing more emotion than he had ever before in his life. He had grown fond of his sole female student, despite what he had let on.

Sir Raoul, well he was a mess. He had forbidden the King's Own from attending the service, for fear of them seeing him like this.

There were her parents, Baron and Baroness of Mindelan. They were still in shock. She had done them proud in her life. They couldn't yet accept her death.

Dom, one of the many who disobeyed their commander, looked almost as forlorn as Neal himself was.

Someone is missing. I know there is.

Neal looked around trying to put his finger on it. Looking was easier than thinking. And it required more concentration.

"Yuki," he said. "Who is not here? There is somebody gone."

She looked sympathetically at him. "You know who it is."

"No, I don't!"

"Neal, you know that she's not here. She can't be."

"Yuki, hush up and listen! Somebody is missing. Somebody that should be here. I know. They are not here! She needs them here!"

Yuki reached up and touched his shoulder. "Neal, everybody is here. Maybe all you are feeling is the loss of her."

"Yuki! I'm not talking about her!"

Neal ran off out of the chapel. He ran hard and fast, looking. He did not know for who. He just knew that he had to look.

He didn't even know where his feet were taking him. When he finally stopped he realized he was in the stables.

"Peachblossom."

The horse never liked Neal. He never knew why. He thought that it was just a funny little painful game that the horse played with him.

But today, he knew. He knew exactly what was making his master's best friend come to him. So when Neal walked up to the strawberry roan, he gave not a fight.

"She always loved you, horse. Even when you stomped on her feet, made her turn ten shades of purple, and were your most… disagreeable. She always loved you. She was convinced that there was a lamb inside of your lion."

If Neal thought that laughing a little would take away the pain, he was wrong. It just made him cry harder.

How he ever heard another thing in that stable over his wailing, he never knew. But there was the little scrap of a human, right there in the corner.

Neal looked up, and saw. And knew. He was who had been missing.

"She's gone isn't she?" Toby asked.

Neal felt the weight of every single muscle as he nodded.

"And I'm not with her. She left me here. She's without her Toby."

"Yeah, but we're going to need you now."

Toby looked down. "She promised that she would never leave. That she would always protect me… And now, she's gone."

Neal stepped away and sat down on the straw next to the boy. "It's like having a part of your body ripped off, isn't it?"

Toby just looked down. And there they sat in the silence. And it was anything but golden.

She loved this little boy. Like a mother to her son, she healed whatever she could, whether it be by asking me to help him physically, or her just staying with him to fix him mentally. She always felt the need to save those who couldn't save themselves. And somehow she always found the way.

Except for now, Neal thought. We can't be saved from this sadness, no matter how much we wish she could just come back and save us.

Kel, I need you. I can't even remember who I was, before I met you. How can I go on like nothing has changed! You've changed me.

You probably never knew how much I admired you. And now, you never will.

How could I be so stupid? I knew I loved you, and then was swept away by beauty. I hope to Mithros that you never loved me. Because if you did then that meant that I hurt you.

And as he started to fall into a miserable sleep along with the boy beside him, something happened. A gift was given to him.

_Neal, this was meant to be. I had a life to live and I lived it._

But I never got to say that I-

_Don't worry. I know._

You know?

_I know. And, Neal? I need you to do something for me._

Anything.

Stefan came to tell Yuki in the middle of the service where Neal was. When he asked if she wanted him to wake him up, she replied no. She'll get him when the time comes.

"Neal…."

He moved his head around in the straw, then started to fall back asleep.

"Neal,"

"Just five more minutes, Kel."

Yuki tried to contain herself as she tried again.

"Neal, you need to get up."

"Kel, I had a nightmare. The Stump'll just have to get over it if…" Neal cut himself off as he realized where exactly he was.

"Yuki?"

"Yeah?"

Neal looked down at Toby. "It really happened, didn't it?"

"Yeah…"

"Yuki?"

"Yes, Neal?"

"She asked me to do something."

There was no need to ask who 'she' was.

"What did she ask you to do?"

"Yuki…. We can't leave Toby all alone."

"I know."

"You do?"

"Yeah. Do you want to wake him?"

Neal slightly smiled as he lifted up his arm, which the boy was sleeping on.

Toby woke up without making a single sound, and sat up and stared right at Neal.

"She spoke to me."

"She had a few words to me, too, Toby."

"She said that she was real sorry for leaving. But that I won't be alone."

"She said that to me too."

"Does this mean that you're my master now?"

Neal ruffled the boy's hair. "How about 'friend'?"

Toby slightly smiled. "I'd like that."

Peachblossom neighed.

"Peachblossom says that he'd like that, too."


End file.
